Scheme

Wasn’t only a dream

More like a scheme

To see

IF I would break

I remember your hands

How they meant to do evil

An upheaval 

Of me

One of your own

As you sat on the throne

Of authority

Keeping me

From experiencing free

I remember learning young that love wasn’t real

Not something you feel

Just words

Empty

Free of meaning

Had to fight 

To scratch the surface

Of true purpose

Remember saying we were worthless?

Guess you won for a time

Waved my white flag in surrender

Bent

Broken

At least a thousand times over

Let their hands

Their words

Their bodies do evil

Personally engaged in my own upheaval 

It’s amazing

How the games changed

After years of absence

Now a passive

Existence

Of this abusive

Dynamic

You’re panicked

Because I remember

An ember

A small flame

Inside my members

That renders 

My self worthy

Not a flurry

But a fury of fight

Light 

Plus sight

Ignite

Because I remember

And won’t let it happen tonight 

From the Hood of A Child

Face down

Frownin’

From the waist down

Walking

From the neck up

Sulking

Chalking it up to the way it’s gonna be

Chin up

No luck

Still stuck

Commanded

Demanded

Reprimanded

Hardly standing

Muted

Hooded

Rooted 

In fear

Afraid to show face

No grace

Erased

Low

Only a shadow

Copy of the master

Disaster

Has to

Self destruct 

Erupt 

Fist up

Defenseless but defensive

Never wins

Pensive

Seeks revenge

Unhinged

But my father!

My rock

My guide

My master

The one that created this disaster

And I gotta ask

“Did you have to win?”

If so

A long time ago

I would’ve given in

Just hand me the gin

Sinking in

I could do it myself

Don’t care how I felt

Drink it down

Happy now?

Erased

Replaced

Now your slave

Wear the hood that you gave

To hide my face

Taste

And see

No more good

Beneath the hood 

Yet there I stood

Still don’t know how I could

Pressure Peers

Peers that put pressure 

Mess with your 

View of self 

Go along with the rest

Test 

Pressed

In on all sides

To do what they do

You do

Voodoo

On who

They tell you to

Unable to think

Give you a wink 

And a nod

To go in that direction

Stressing 

The importance that you be like them

On a whim

Trim 

Same skin

Boxed in

Look the part

Throw the dart

At who you really are

Acting 

While they clapping

Cracking 

Up

Finally got caught

Cause you forgot

Them- you are not 

How much do we do because someone expects it?

Check it

We’ve wrecked it

Gave them the reigns

Put ourself back in chains

Now we’re to blame

Framed

For false pretenses

Fake images

Making copies and printing ’em

Handing them out by the hundreds

Mind stunted

Shunned

Grab the gun

Pull the trigger 

Cause we aren’t who we are

Far

Reality charred

Scarred

Marred 

For lack of integrity  

Dishonesty

Contrary 

To who I was made to be

We the people 

We are the people 

Every single one of us 

“The scum” of us 

The mill of the run of us 

The ones that think they’re wonderous 

See, we’ve been hypnotized 

Prioritizing 

Ostracizing 

Those that aren’t similar 

But that’s pitiful 

See, we all got this one thing in common

And it’s our bond 

No magic wand 

We are people 

All hearts beating 

With the rhythm of the next one 

Put down the guns 

Open arms to each one 

No matter race 

Religion chased 

Different tastes 

Let’s make haste 

To see each other as people 

To meet at the steeple 

Have revival as equals 

– makes me think of Aleppo… Don’t turn blind, open wide, to worldwide hatred. Do something. 

No 9

About this notion 

So called love potion 

What a man does for love 

“Sets his woman above” 

Same line and verse

Typical slurs 

Pull up the hearse 

Say goodbye to self

This the hand you were dealt 

Running to here and to there 

Pull up a chair

“Let down your hair”

Man cave or dragon lair

Man breathes fire

Is a liar 

Raises higher 

She recognizes less 

Of her beautiful self 

He preys on her chest 

And what she has to offer 

Man laughs and scoffs at her 

Took the life out of her 

No more

Love potion is this 

Don’t start and end with a kiss 

No true bliss

That is the gist 

One Thousand White Women

I feel like if you want to learn some good life nuggets, start a fight. 

For someone.

For a people group. 

Or against someone that wasn’t your person. 

(And by fight , I hardly mean to be an aggressor. Rather, drown out those tapes with those same voices from that person that never was your person.) 

If you want to learn some truth about yourself, wage a war against voices saying what you have to be, look like or act like.

I feel like then you will be stripped and left with truth and wisdom to go forward.

You will no longer reflect all those “shoulds”, “woulds” and “coulds”.

Am is all that will be left.

Below is a quote from the current book I’m reading :

“In my case, war was a stern teacher of truth, if not wisdom.” 

-Jim Fergus, “One Thousand White Women”

Serendipity 

Fate

Destiny 

Or as some people put it, 

Serendipity 

I rather say timing

Clock chiming 

Time and place

Having faith 

In the system 

Belief – system 

His omniscience 

Our dependence 

Simon casting nets 

Empty as of yet 

“Cast again” 

To his chagrin 

“We worked all day and night,

Time isn’t right.”

Trust 

You must

In deeper waters

Let his net down 

Fish found 

By the hundreds

It’s a wonder 

Or is it?

That’s His grace

Past erased 

Present saved 

Future placed

In His most trusted hands.