Tag Archives: diary

Soul Soil

Soul soil A new phrase I’ve coined

To give me a visual 

Of what to take in

And what to leave out

don’t doubt me on this 

there won’t be a test

at least not one that’s written 

This soul soil 

If it’s rich

Can promote

Growth

And hope

As its massaged in His hands

And then sifted

Made sure to spread evenly

To keep even the dark corners clean

To foster new meaning

this soul soil

Is ample

enough

For even the most temperamental

Tough

stubborn

Hard headed

And stuck

it is gleaned from the Father

not my contoured

Conjured up fodder

He gives it

Keeps it

Sustains it

Reaps it

For the soul soil is for Him

For Him to take root

make new

shoo

away pests

Wreaking havoc

On depth 

Of our souls!

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Anxiety

Anxiety 

Yes, you’re telling me but not really 

Because we aren’t quite free

To speak

of that which holds us

So I’m telling myself

Exercise

Eat right

Fight the urge and purge

It’ll get better

but then it doesn’t

So, I’m stressed to the max

and it’s seen in my actions

Depression and rage times a thousand

You should see me behind closed doors

Man, you would be floored

If you witnessed

Even a hint of it

But, it’s kinda taboo

To discuss

A less than perfect version

So what’s left?

Unrest and anxiety

More pressure to please

Less freedom to be

Fear of being seen

With all my imperfections

So I dare not speak

Of the hidden Inner

That’s riddled with tension

and I’ll keep on pretending

until I’ve sought the one that renders

Me as exceedingly perfect

till the hurtful is no longer worth it

till I expose those

Things that he chose to go 

to the cross for 

and when He rose, He showed

How the imperfect becomes perfect

How the depression becomes redemption

How He chose another ending

Without apprehesion

because He saw me as a treasure

Now, how’s that for value?

And it changed up the game

that I am no longer lame

But now I have the freedom to change!

Humanity

It’s insanity 

No amnesty 

Just villanies

For humanity

I may seem radical

But I’m simply human

Can’t take it 

Cause I’m fuming 

Either that or I’m crying

Cause they’re dying

The timing 

The fake crimes and

I’m trying 

To hold it in

Not popular opinion 

In this town 

Skin isn’t Brown

So I found myself bound

And ideas shut down

These ideals

Instilled

And pushed hard just to cosign

Not think for myself

But sign on the line

But when I look at mankind

Can’t help but see the design

Can’t turn a blind eye

Or an open one no less

I will not be quiet

Start a peaceful riot

One that begins conversation

Starts persuasion

Shuts down manipulation 

Stops the comparison

Opens eyes to the marginalized

Criminalized

Ostracized

Victimized

Demonized

And begin To 

Humanize 

Instead

Humanizing another simply means seeing another individual as a human. Along with that is possibly just the acknowledgement that they be treated as such.

Who can argue with that? No, seriously, who?

Unlearning 

There’s this term 

“Unlearning”

Yearning 

To be stripped 

Ripped 

And Sifted

See, we’ve been tripped up 

By the things they’ve conjured up  

Held as truth 

This ban on youth 

Conspiring ruse

To quiet the muse 

I have my own way of thinking 

Heard not just seen 

Through verbs, not in memes 

Shot down when I spoke up

So I learned to choke what 

Drove us 

Both 

Me and my sister(s)

Learning to unlearn 

All the silence 

Violence 

Tyrants 

And to Unchoke

The hope

That woke

Me up to my dream 

CLOSED 

Was thinking about how my life has opened up as I’ve opened up . Opened up about my story,  Opened up my heart to let people know me more and me know them, and ultimately Opened up my mind. 

I Was thinking on the opposite of open which is closed obviously .

So I’m thinking on all these things as I’m supposed to be in bed because I have power yoga at 830. Who wants to power through yoga at dawn? OK, it’s not technically at dawn. It is actually three hours past dawn but can’t  dawn be relative? Can’t dawn be different for everyone ?  So for me 8:30 equals dawn .

Here’s the poem I wrote when I should’ve been asleep. 

Closed 

Lay low 

Away stowed 

Info 

Into 

Who 

I used to

What 

I’ve been bruised

When

I made it through

Where 

I came to

Why

I tell you

My truth 

Stay open 

Hoping

And Noticing

On the regular 

Telling ya

We’re actually similar 

Citizen 

This is written with inspiration from Obama’s Farewell Address.

Citizen 

An underpin 

Not to weaken 

But sustain 

Change 

Identify as American 

A title

Not to take lightly 

But to live up to

The pursuit of real truth

Proof

That all are equal

People

Peaceful 

Know our role

Pay the toll

Of putting them first

Be the church

Stake in the ground 

Not lost but found-ed

On principles

For our fellows

Red and yellow

Black and white

That all citizens be precious

In our sight 

Alright ?

Sensitive

Hearts softened 

Jaws droppin’

At the slightest offense 

Toward an acquaintance or friend 

Can’t decide if it’s good or its bad

To take things so personally 

On another’s behalf 

This name callin’

Such gall 

Built walls 

Now our tears fallin’

This sensitivity 

And empathy 

And “hearts burdened be”

Is what the world needs 

What I need 

To breed peace 

To set free 

A new reality 

Where walls are down 

Hate is drowned

Love is found 

We’re “home” – ward bound